Westheimer, Ruth K(arola) 1928-
WESTHEIMER, Ruth K(arola) 1928-
(Dr. Ruth)
PERSONAL:
Born Karola Ruth Siegel, 1928, in Frankfurt, Germany; immigrated to United States, 1956; married twice (divorced); married Manfred Westheimer, April 2, 1961 (deceased, April 3, 1997); children: (second marriage) Miriam; (third marriage) Joel. Education: Attended Sorbonne, University of Paris; New School for Social Research (now New School University), M.A.; Columbia University, Ed.D., 1970. Religion: Jewish.
ADDRESSES:
Home—New York, NY. Office—c/o Communications Connection, 145 West 45th St., Ste. 1009, New York, NY 10036. E-mail—[email protected].
CAREER:
Author, educator, media personality, and psychosexual therapist in private practice. Presenter of radio program Sexually Speaking, beginning 1980. Host of television programs such as The Dr. Ruth Show, The All-New Dr. Ruth Show, and What's up, Dr. Ruth, all for Lifetime cable network; Ask Dr. Ruth, distributed by King Features Entertainment; Never Too Late, broadcast by Nostalgia Television beginning 1980; Good Sex!; and You're On the Air with Dr. Ruth. Presenter of television series in England, Hebrew-language programs in Israel, and other programming in Luxembourg, Germany, Switzerland, and France. Producer of television documentaries, including Surviving Salvation and No Missing Link, both broadcast by Public Broadcasting Service (PBS). Appeared in television programs and films, including One Women or Two, Dr. Ruth's House, Quantum Leap, Comedy Battle of the Sexes, More than Broken Glass: Memories of Kristallnacht, and as Dr. Wordheimer in the PBS children's educational program Between the Lions. Appeared in videotape programs, including Terrific Sex, Making Love, Volume I: Arousal, Foreplay, and Orgasm, and Making Love, Volume III: Ten Secrets for Greater Sensual Pleasure, produced by Playboy Enterprises. Cornell University, adjunct associate professor at New York Hospital-Cornell University Medical Center. Teacher at Herbert H. Lehman College, Brooklyn College, Adelphi University, Columbia University, New York University, and U.S. Military Academy at West Point; fellow, New York Academy of Medicine; lecturer at Brookdale Hospital. Worked as a kindergarten teacher in Paris, France; worked for Planned Parenthood. Military service: Served in Haganah (Jewish freedom fighters), Palestine (now Israel), c. 1944.
MEMBER:
New York Academy of Medicine.
AWARDS, HONORS:
Named Mother of the Year, National Mother's Day Committee; Liberty Medal, City of New York; CableACE Award, National Cable Television Association, 1988, for The All-New Dr. Ruth Show, four CableACE award nominations; Gold Medal, International Film and TV Festival, for excellence in educational television; named among most intriguing people of the century, People; honorary doctorate, Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion, 2000; twice named college lecturer of the year.
WRITINGS:
Dr. Ruth's Guide to Good Sex, Warner Books (New York, NY), 1983.
First Love: A Young People's Guide to Sexual Information, Warner Books (New York, NY), 1985.
Dr. Ruth's Guide for Married Lovers, Warner Books (New York, NY), 1986.
Dr. Ruth's Computer Game of Good Sex (computer program), Avalon Hill Game Company (Baltimore, MD), 1986.
(With Ben Yagoda) All in a Lifetime: An Autobiography, Warner Books (New York, NY), 1987.
Sex and Morality: Who Is Teaching Our Sex Standards?, Harcourt Brace Jovanovich (Boston, MA), 1988.
(With Louis Lieberman) Dr. Ruth's Guide to Erotic and Sensuous Pleasures, Shapolsky Publishers (New York, NY), 1991.
(With Steven Kaplan) Surviving Salvation: The Ethiopian Jewish Family in Transition, New York University Press (New York, NY), 1992.
Dr. Ruth's Guide to Safer Sex, Warner Books (New York, NY), 1992.
The Art of Arousal, Abbeville Press (New York, NY), 1993.
Dr. Ruth Talks to Kids: Where You Came from, How Your Body Changes, and What Sex Is All About, illustrated by Diane deGroat, Macmillan (New York, NY), 1993.
(Editor-in-chief) Dr. Ruth's Encyclopedia of Sex, Continuum (New York, NY), 1994, revised edition published as Encyclopedia of Sex, 2000.
Sex for Dummies, IDG Books Worldwide (Foster City, CA), 1995.
(With Jonathan Mark) Heavenly Sex: Sex in the Jewish Tradition, New York University Press (New York, NY), 1995.
(With Ben Yagoda) The Value of Family: A Blueprint for the Twenty-first Century, Warner Books (New York, NY), 1996.
(With Pierre A. Lehu) Dr. Ruth Talks about Grandparents: Advice for Kids on Making the Most of a Special Relationship, pictures by Tracey Campbell Pearson, Farrar, Straus and Giroux (New York, NY), 1997.
(With Steven Kaplan) Grandparenthood, Routledge (New York, NY), 1998.
(With Amos Grünebaum) Dr. Ruth's Pregnancy Guide for Couples: Love, Sex, and Medical Facts, Routledge (New York, NY), 1999.
(With Pierre A. Lehu) Dr. Ruth's Guide to College Life: The Savvy Student's Handbook, Madison Books (Lanham, MD), 2000.
Power: The Ultimate Aphrodisiac, Madison Books (Lanham, MD), 2001.
Who Am I? Where Did I Come From? (children's book), Golden Books (New York, NY), 2001.
Rekindling Romance for Dummies, IDG Books Worldwide (Foster City, CA), 2001.
(With Sanford Lopater) Human Sexuality: A Psychosocial Perspective, Lippincott Williams & Wilkins (Philadelphia, PA), 2002.
Musically Speaking: A Life through Song, University of Pennsylvania Press (Philadelphia, PA), 2003.
(With Pierre A. Lehu) Conquering the Rapids of Life: Making the Most of Midlife Opportunities, Taylor Trade Publishing (Lanham, MD), 2003.
(With Pierre A. Lehu) Fifty-two Lessons on Communicating Love: Tips, Anecdotes, and Advice for Connecting with the One You Love from America's Leading Relationship Therapist, Blue Mountain Press (Boulder, CO), 2004.
(With Pierre A. Lehu) Dr. Ruth's Guide to Talking about Herpes, Grove Press (New York, NY), 2004.
Author of syndicated column, "Ask Dr. Ruth." Creator of Dr. Ruth's Good Sex Night-to-Night Calendar, 1993 and 1994, and Dr. Ruth's Game of Good Sex (board game). Contributor to volumes such as The Lover's Companion: Art and Poetry of Desire, edited by Charles Sullivan, Abrams (New York, NY), 2002. Contributor to periodicals such as Forward.
ADAPTATIONS:
Dr. Ruth's Encyclopedia of Sex was also published on CD-ROM.
SIDELIGHTS:
Author, therapist, educator, syndicated columnist, and television celebrity Ruth K. Westheimer, best known to her vast radio and television audience as Dr. Ruth, is an unlikely media sex star. Diminutive—she stands four feet, seven inches tall—energetic, with a rolling German accent and the look of a favorite grandmother, Westheimer carved out a successful career on the American airwaves by dispensing humorous and bluntly frank—but uncompromisingly honest—advice on sexual matters to adults, teens, and even kids.
Born Karola Ruth Siegel in 1928, Westheimer spent her early life in Frankfurt, Germany. At the age of ten, she left her German homeland as one of 300 German-Jewish children sent to a children's school in Switzerland, which later became an orphanage and refugee home for children whose parents were killed in the Holocaust. By the time she left Germany, her father had already been taken away to a detention camp; she believes that he, her mother, and grandmother were killed at the Auschwitz concentration camp.
When she was sixteen, Westheimer went to Israel, where she joined the Haganah, the Jewish freedom fighters who battled for Israel's independence. An early marriage ended in divorce shortly after she moved to Paris, where she attended the Sorbonne and taught kindergarten. In 1956 she immigrated to the United States, married her second husband, Dan, and had her first child, Miriam. This marriage also ended in divorce. During a ski trip in the Catskill Mountains, she met Fred Westheimer, a telecommunications consultant. "When we met, I had been married twice, and Fred had never been married," Westheimer said in a People magazine profile by Cynthia Wang. "He was thirty-five years old, and his parents had given up on him ever getting married. I knew right away I would marry him; he didn't know it so fast." The couple married in 1961 and had a son, Joel. They remained happily married until Fred Westheimer's death in 1997.
In addition to her education at the Sorbonne, Westheimer attended the New School for Social Research, where she received a master's degree in sociology. She earned an Ed.D. in education—the source of her sobriquet of Dr. Ruth—from Columbia University in 1970. A brief stint working for Planned Parenthood convinced her to continue her education, and she studied human sexuality at New York Hospital-Cornell University Medical Center, where she later served as adjunct associate professor for five years.
Westheimer's media career began modestly with a fifteen-minute taped radio show, Sexually Speaking, in 1980. A year later, it had evolved into an hour-long live night-time show, during which Westheimer fielded calls from listeners. She quickly branched out into television, appearing first on the Lifetime network on The Dr. Ruth Show, and continuing with other programs such as Good Sex!, Ask Dr. Ruth, and It's Never Too Late, where she offered advice on sexual matters and counsel to call-in viewers. Jeff Jarvis, reviewing Good Sex! in People, called it "the strangest show on television. But you have to say one thing for it: It's a kick to watch." Soon, Dr. Ruth became a genuine celebrity, sitting in on talk shows, guest-starring in movies and television programs, and making sly cameo appearances. Her media presence expanded to include video tapes, computer software, and even board games and calendars. "What has helped me is that Jewish tradition says a lesson taught with humor is a lesson retained," Westheimer remarked in an interview with Stefanie Weiss in NEA Today. "That helps me a great deal, because teaching human sexuality, you have to use humor. Not jokes. I couldn't tell you a joke. But humor."
As an author, Westheimer has produced more than two dozen books and reference works for audiences ranging from grandparents to new parents, college students to preschool children. She contributed books to the popular "For Dummies" series as the author of Sex for Dummies and Rekindling Romance for Dummies.
Who Am I? Where Did I Come From?, published by Golden Books and written with Pierre A. Lehu, is a pop-up book designed to gently and inoffensively teach preschool and kindergarten children about sexual reproduction and the differences between boys and girls. Although the publisher was initially nervous about the subject matter, Westheimer's straightforward but honest approach won out. "(Initial editorial guidelines) kind of softened a bit because Ruth is not a b.s. sort of person," commented Rachele Keith, Westheimer's Golden Books editor, in a Chicago Tribune article by Rob Elder. "She's not one to skirt the issues at all." Keith continued: "And, as we go through it, we ask ourselves: What was the point? We have our image to present to the public, we are a family company—but there's nothing wrong with teaching your children about sex." Westheimer is an educator who "insists on being direct with children, teaching them proper terminology," Elder observed.
Dr. Ruth Talks to Kids: Where You Came From, How Your Body Changes, and What Sex Is All About takes a similar lesson to a teen and preteen audience. Couched in terms of a conversation between Westheimer and her readers, the book explains the changes seen in a maturing body, explores the emotional and social challenges of puberty, and provides frank discussion of sexually transmitted diseases, sexual abuse, and more. She counsels that teenagers should not allow themselves to be pressured into engaging in sexual activity. A Publishers Weekly reviewer noted that Westheimer "manages to touch upon those topics teens are most likely to be curious about," while Entertainment Weekly critic Susan Stewart called the book "simply the happiest sex book you'll ever read."
Dr. Ruth's Encyclopedia of Sex offers the adult reader a selection of more than 250 entries and 100 illustrations on diverse sexual topics, including the mechanics of sex, the biology of sex, and sexual issues related to law, culture, and religion. "The final pages offer a glossary of sexual slang guaranteed to teach even the most worldly reader a term or two," noted a Publishers Weekly reviewer. Dr. Ruth's Pregnancy Guide for Couples: Love, Sex, and Medical Facts provides "a compendium of sound information for couples" planning for and experiencing pregnancy and childbirth, commented Library Journal reviewer M. G. Katz. The Value of Family: A Blueprint for the Twenty-first Century "gives direct, useful suggestions for improving the quality of family life," stated Ilene Cooper in Booklist, and a Publishers Weekly reviewer remarked that the book offers "a humane, levelheaded, eye-opening look at changing family dynamics."
Grandparenthood, written with Steve Kaplan, helps grandparents adjust to their role in the lives of their children and their children's children, and offers "thorough, commonsense advice filled with lots of love all around," wrote Linda Beck in Library Journal. Dr. Ruth Talks about Grandparents: Advice for Kids on Making the Most of a Special Relationship brings the range of Westheimer's counsel full circle, demonstrating what Booklist reviewer Stephanie Zvirin called the "mutually beneficial aspects of a relationship between children and their grandparents."
Among her more recent books are Fifty-two Lessons on Communicating Love: Tips, Anecdotes, and Advice for Connecting with the One You Love from America's Leading Relationship Therapist, and Dr. Ruth's Guide to Talking about Herpes, both written with Lehu. And in 2003's Musically Speaking: A Life through Song, Westheimer examines how music has played a key role throughout her life. A Publishers Weekly reviewer called the memoir a "touching and frequently witty account."
"I don't teach morality, but I couldn't teach sexuality without having that undertone of responsibility," Westheimer commented in her NEA Today interview with Weiss. "Don't hurt anybody," she said. "Make sure that everything is with consent."
BIOGRAPHICAL AND CRITICAL SOURCES:
BOOKS
Westheimer, Ruth K., Musically Speaking: A Life through Song, University of Pennsylvania Press (Philadelphia, PA), 2003.
Westheimer, Ruth K., and Ben Yagoda, All in a Lifetime: An Autobiography, Warner Books (New York, NY), 1987.
PERIODICALS
Akron Beacon Journal, January 15, 1996, Regina Brett, review of Heavenly Sex: Sex in the Jewish Tradition.
American Baby, March, 1984, Richard Mintzer, "Speaking with Dr. Ruth" (interview), p. 44.
Billboard, November 1, 1995, Aaron Cohen, review of Heavenly Sex, p. 440; October 11, 2003, Jim Bessman, review of Musically Speaking: A Life through Song, p. 76.
Booklist, July, 1993, Stephanie Zvirin, review of Dr. Ruth Talks to Kids: Where You Came from, How Your Body Changes, and What Sex Is All About, p. 1956; September 1, 1994, review of Dr. Ruth's Encyclopedia of Sex, p. 66; June 1, 1996, Ilene Cooper, review of The Value of Family: A Blueprint for the Twenty-first Century, p. 1628; August, 1997, Zvirin, review of Dr. Ruth Talks about Grandparents: Advice for Kids on Making the Most of a Special Relationship, p. 1897; August, 1998, Ray Olson, review of Grandparenthood, p. 1920; April 1, 1999, Olson, review of Dr. Ruth's Pregnancy Guide for Couples: Love, Sex, and Medical Facts, p. 1374; February 15, 2001, Mary Ellen Quinn, review of Encyclopedia of Sex, p. 1178.
Changing Times, December, 1985, "On the Road with Dr. Ruth," p. 26.
Charlotte Observer, November 14, 1994, Sandy Hill, "Variety Is the Spice of Sexual Life, Dr. Ruth Says" (interview).
Chatelaine, February, 1988, Joy Fielding, review of All in a Lifetime: An Autobiography, p. 10.
Chicago Tribune, May 1, 2001, Rob Elder, review of Who Am I? Where Did I Come From?
Christianity Today, September 2, 1988, Terry C. Muck, review of Sex and Morality: Who Is Teaching Our Sex Standards?, p. 15.
Editor & Publisher, July 31, 2000, p. 37.
Entertainment Weekly, April 30, 1993, Susan Stewart, review of Dr. Ruth Talks to Kids, p. 70; May 28, 1993, Kate Meyers, "The Joy of Dr. Ruth," p. 58; March 16, 2001, Matthew Flamm, review of Who Am I? Where Did I Come From?, p. 61.
Executive Female, March-April, 1986, p. 45.
Film Comment, July-August, 1986, Marcia Pally, "Dr. Ruth: A Can-do Conversation with a Subject Where Sex Is the Object," p. 49.
Harper's Bazaar, July, 1985, Eileen Stukane, "Good Sense about Sex from Dr. Ruth," p. 158; June, 1992, p. 115.
Health, April, 1983, John Grossmann, "Dr. Ruth, Radio Sex Therapist: To Her Fans, 'Grandma Freud' Is a Lifesaver; To Others, She's an Offensive Buttinsky," p. 64.
Ladies' Home Journal, February, 1986, Patricia Bosworth, "Talking with Dr. Goodsex," p. 82.
Library Journal, November 15, 1987, Terrill Brooks, review of All in a Lifetime, p. 77; May 15, 1993, Joan Levin, review of The Art of Arousal, p. 67; July, 1994, A. Arro Smith, review of Dr. Ruth's Encyclopedia of Sex, p. 84; October 15, 1995, Marcia Welsh, review of Heavenly Sex, p. 78; August, 1996, Kay Brodie, review of The Value of Family, p. 94; November 15, 1998, Linda Beck, review of Grandparenthood, p. 87; May 1, 1999, Linda M. G. Katz, review of Dr. Ruth's Pregnancy Guide for Couples, p. 104; October 1, 2000, Samuel T. Huang, review of Dr. Ruth's Guide to College Life: The Savvy Student's Handbook, p. 119.
Life, January, 1986, p. 26; September, 1987, "Dr. Ruth Hits the Hay," p. 8; November, 1987, Gregory Jaynes, "Over the Alps and through the Shops with Dr. Ruth: A Sex Therapist in Search of Her Past," p. 127.
McCall's, October, 1983, Barbara Grizzuti Harrison, "The Truth according to Dr. Ruth," p. 76; July, 1988, Karen Pritzker, "How to Stay Happily Married: Six Stars Share Their Secrets," p. 48.
Motor Boating & Sailing, July, 1988, Polly Whittell, "Dr. Ruth on Sex and High Performance," p. 54.
National Review, May 13, 1983, "Radio Sex," p. 577.
NEA Today, October, 1998, Stefanie Weiss, "Birds, Bees, and Details" (interview), p. 46.
Newsweek, May 3, 1982, "Talking Sex with Dr. Ruth," p. 78; September 16, 1985, Bill Barol, "Dr. Ruth: Sex, Inc.," p. 66.
New York, November 1, 1982, James Wolcott, "Dr. Ruth," p. 74.
New York Daily News, April 2, 2001, Amanda Gardner, "Dr. Ruth Says Rev up Your Relationship with Body Paint and a Deck of Cards" (interview).
New York Times, December 1, 1985, William E. Geist, "Merchandising Dr. Ruth," p. 58; October 23, 1986, Philip H. Dougherty, "Dr. Ruth Helps Sell Mousse," p. 52; January 20, 1987, Nina Darnton, "'Dr. Ruth' Has Star Role in New Film from France," p. 16; February 6, 1987, Janet Maslin, movie review of One Woman or Two, p. 14; September 27, 1987, John C. Boland, "Little Help from Dr. Ruth," p. F10; October 26, 1987, Georgia Dullea, "Therapist to Therapist: Analyzing Dr. Ruth," p. 20; August 24, 1990, Walter Goodman, television review of You're on the Air with Dr. Ruth, p. B4; December 21, 1995, Bob Morris, "Dr. Ruth Finds a Link between Sex and the Soul: 'Got Is the Ultimate Sex Therapist'" (interview) p. B1; December 13, 1998, James Barron, "Some Things Never Age. Just Ask Dr. Ruth," p. 1.
New York Times Book Review, January 10, 1988, Helen Dudar, review of All in a Lifetime, p. 7; July 11, 1993, Susie Bright, review of The Art of Arousal, p. 13.
People, March 8, 1982, Judy Bachrach, "New Yorkers Worried about Their Sex Lives Call Dr. Ruth for Some Over-the-air Advice," p. 51; April 15, 1985, D. Keith Mano, television review of Good Sex!, p. 108; July 15, 1985, Jeff Jarvis, television review of Good Sex!, p. 12; January 20, 1986, "Librarian Ann Scarpellino Tells Sexologist Dr. Ruth Westheimer about the Birds, Bees, and Boo-boos," p. 59; November 7, 1988, Jarvis, television review of More than Broken Glass: Memories of Kristallnacht, p. 11; October 20, 1997, Cynthia Want, "Love and Loss: Newly Widowed, Dr. Ruth Confronts Her Grief and Life without Fred," p. 87.
Publishers Weekly, March 11, 1983, review of Dr. Ruth's Guide to Good Sex, p. 73; May 30, 1986, Genevieve Stuttaford, review of Dr. Ruth's Guide for Married Lovers, p. 51; October 30, 1987, Stuttaford, review of All in a Lifetime, p. 61; March 22, 1993, review of The Art of Arousal, p. 63; April 12, 1993, review of Dr. Ruth Talks to Kids, p. 65; June 27, 1994, review of Dr. Ruth's Encyclopedia of Sex, p. 73; September 25, 1995, Paul Nathan, "Sex Tips from the Bible," review of Heavenly Sex, p. 16; June 3, 1996, review of The Value of Family, p. 69; May 18, 1998, review of Dr. Ruth Talks to Kids, p. 82; September 29, 2003, review of Musically Speaking, p. 57.
Redbook, October, 1989, Alan W. Petrucelli and Ellen Bryon, "Stars Say—What Makes a Good Friend," p. 22.
Savvy, June, 1985, Patricia Burstein, "Love Is in the Air," p. 72.
School Library Journal, January, 1986, Susan A. Hopkins, review of First Love: A Young People's Guide to Sexual Information, p. 76; June, 1993, Denise L. Moll, review of Dr. Ruth Talks to Kids, p. 124; September, 1997, Rosalyn Pierini, review of Dr. Ruth Talks about Grandparents, p. 238.
Seventeen, December, 1989, "Ruth Rules: What's up with the Doc," p. 34.
Time, July 1, 1985, John Leo, "The Munchkin of the Bedroom: Ralph and Wanda Talk about Dr. Ruth Westheimer," p. 52; November 9, 1987, Guy D. Garcia and Martha Smilgis, review of All in a Lifetime, p. 94; April 17, 2000, James Poniewozik, television review of Between the Lions, p. 81.
TV Guide, October 27, 1984, Robert MacKenzie, television review of Good Sex!, p. 48.
U.S. News & World Report, February 18, 1991, "Ruth Westheimer," p. 16.
Variety, February 13, 1985, television review of Good Sex!, p. 126; June 20, 1990, television review of Dr. Ruth's House, p. 57.
Wall Street Journal, May 18, 1987, Martha Bayles, television review of Ask Dr. Ruth, p. 21; January 14, 1988, Amy Clyde, review of All in a Lifetime, p. 26; July 3, 1990, "Through the Open Door: What Is It like to be an Immigrant in America?," p. A10.
Wilson Library Bulletin, January, 1986, Patty Campbell, review of First Love, p. 49; September, 1994, review of Dr. Ruth's Encyclopedia of Sex, p. 77.
Women's Wear Daily, August 3, 1998, Karyn Monget, "Dr. Ruth on Lingerie," p. B14.
ONLINE
Dr. Ruth Web site,http://www.ivillage.com/relationships/experts/drruth (September 1, 2004).
Florida Times-Union Online,http://www.jacksonville.com/ (March 3, 1998), Mike Stobbe, "Dr. Ruth Still Advocates Frank Talk on Subject of Sex."
OnlineCasino.com,http://www.onlinecasino.com/ (September 1, 2004), Tina Caputo, interview with Westheimer.*