Teresa de Ávila

Excerpt from The Life of Teresa of Jesus (1611)

Translated by E. Allison Peers
Published in 1960

The Spanish religious reformer Teresa de Ávila (Teresa of Jesus; 1515–1582) was an important figure in the Catholic Reformation (also called the Counter Reformation), a reform movement within the Roman Catholic Church that took place in the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries (see Roman Catholic Church entry). The Roman Catholic Church is a Christian religion based in Rome, Italy, and headed by a pope. When the Catholic Reformation began in the mid-1500s, Catholicism was still the only established Christian religion in the Western (non-Asian) world. Nevertheless, the stability of the church was being threatened by the Protestant Reformation, a widespread reform movement in central Europe that was started by the German theology professor (teacher of religion) Martin Luther in 1517 (see Martin Luther entry). By the end of the sixteenth century Protestants had formed their own Christian denominations (church groups), which were separate from the Catholic Church. Teresa is credited with reviving Catholicism in the 1560s and 1570s when Protestantism threatened to bring down the church. Her most significant contribution was the founding of the Reformed Discalced (Barefoot) Carmelite Convent of San Jose, a Catholic order for women. At the time of her death in 1582 she had started seventeen new Reformed Discalced Carmelite convents, or religious houses, in Spain.

Teresa is best known today as one of the great Catholic mystics (those who believe in direct knowledge of God through intense spiritual experience). She had many mystical experiences, called raptures, which she described in several books. Among her most widely read works is her autobiography, The Life of Teresa of Jesus (1611).

Teresa joins Carmelites

Teresa was born Teresa de Cepeda y Ahumada in 1515 on a farm near Ávila, Spain. Her father was Alonso (Pina) de Cepeda, son of a wealthy Jewish businessman who had converted to Christianity, and her mother was Beatriz de Ahumada, a farmer's daughter. When Teresa was fourteen she entered Our Lady of Grace convent, where she remained until she became ill with a weak heart in 1532. She also suffered from rheumatoid arthritis (painful inflammation and swelling of the joints) for the rest of her life. After recuperating for nearly three years, she decided to become a nun. One of her greatest fears was going to hell (the place where sinners go after death) when she died, and she wanted to be a nun because of that fear. Her father disapproved of her decision, so she ran away to the Carmelite Convent of the Encarnacion (Incarnation) in Ávila. She became a nun in 1537 and took the name of Teresa de Jesus. The convent, which was uncloistered (nuns were not required to stay inside), offered great freedom to the Carmelites. They wore perfume, jewelry, and colorful sashes. Later, Teresa called it "an inn just off the road of hell." While living at the convent she met a nobleman and fell in love, an experience that was deeply disturbing to her. About a year later she became ill again and left the Carmelites. While recovering at her sister's home she began reading books on "mystical theology," a religious philosophy based on intense spiritual experiences. Teresa rejoined the Carmelites around 1540 and spent the next three years, as she put it in Life, "from pastime to pastime, from vanity to vanity, from occasion to occasion."

In 1543, Teresa's father died and she went through a long struggle with inner conflicts. Although she suffered over the next ten years, the people around her saw her as a "distinguished lady" who was "gay and witty." Teresa agonized over her feelings for men, especially a nobleman and priest named Garcia de Toledo. In 1554 she experienced a conversion, or spiritual change, when she saw a statue of the wounded Jesus of Nazareth (called Christ), the founder of Christianity. Then someone gave her a copy of Confessions by Saint Augustine (354–430), an early church leader. She identified with the spiritual suffering described by Augustine and realized that she was not destined for eternal suffering in hell. The following year she asked for permission to leave the convent. Her request was granted because her practices in penance (seeking forgiveness for sin) and prayer were considered extreme, compared to the casual lifestyle of the Carmelites. She went to live with a friend and spent her time reading. In 1557, Pope Paul IV established the Index of Forbidden Books, a list of works that the Roman Catholic Church considered to be heretical (in violation of the laws of God and the church). Many mystical books were on the list, so Teresa could not continue her study of mystical theology. In 1559, her book collection was burned by judges of the Spanish Inquisition, a church court established for the purpose of finding and punishing heretics.

Life is criticized by the church

Teresa had been writing Life, and she completed the book in 1562. Since mystical works had been banned, the Inquisition judges ordered her to expand the manuscript by filling in facts about her visions. Many times she fell into seizures, or trancelike states, and did not remember what had happened. Witnesses described these events, and gossip had spread throughout the community. Teresa claimed to hear voices and see visions of both the devil (figure who represents evil) and Christ. As a result of these visions, many people thought she was possessed by the devil and should be exorcised (a ritual in which a priest drives out evil spirits). According to some accounts, Teresa also experienced levitation (lifting of the body by supernatural forces). She did not want church officials to know about her visions because inquisitors were searching for heretics and burning them at the stake. She feared that inquisitors would think she was making a pact with the devil and would convict her of heresy. Teresa completed her expanded version of Life in 1565 and it was accepted by the inquisitors. (The church did not approve the publication of any of Teresa's works until 1588, six years after her death. Life was published in 1611.)

Things to Remember While Reading an Excerpt from The Life of Teresa of Jesus:

1. One of Teresa's greatest fears was going to hell when she died, and she decided to become a nun because of that fear. In this excerpt she vividly described a terrible vision in which she was plunged directly into hell. She believed it was the Lord's (God's) will that she visit this place so she would know the punishment awaiting sinners. The experience left her determined not to sin again.
2. Notice that Teresa mentioned Lutherans in the last paragraph. "Lutheran" was the name for followers of Martin Luther; they were also known as Protestants. Teresa singled out Lutherans as being destined for hell because they had been baptized as Catholics and were committing heresy by challenging the church.

Excerpt from The Life of Teresa of Jesus

I was at prayer one day when suddenly, without knowing how, I found myself, as I thought, plunged right into hell. I realized that it was the Lord's will that I should see the place which the devils had prepared for me there and which I had merited for my sins. This happened in the briefest space of time, but, even if I were to live for many years, I believe it would be impossible for me to forget it. The entrance, I thought, resembled a very long, narrow passage, like a furnace, very low, dark and closely confined; the ground seemed to be full of water which looked like filthy, evil-smelling mud, and in it were many wicked-looking reptiles. At the end there was a hollow place scooped out of a wall, like a cupboard, and it was here that I found myself in close confinement. But the sight of all this was pleasant by comparison with what I felt there. What I have said is in no way an exaggeration.

Ecstasy of St. Teresa

One of Teresa's most famous visions was portrayed by the Italian artist Gian Bernini in the painting Ecstasy of St. Teresa. It depicts her description, in Life, of an angel piercing her heart with the burning tip of a lance (long, spearlike weapon). Teresa wrote:

The pain was so great that it made me moan over and over, and the sweet delight into which that pain threw me was so intense that one could not want it to stop, or the soul be contented with anything but God. It is not bodily pain, but spiritual, though the body does not cease to share in it somewhat—and even very much so.

Paralysis

Paralysis: Loss of ability to move.

Divers

Divers: Various.

Oppression

Oppression: A sense of being weighed down in body or mind.

Suffocation

Suffocation: Lack of air.

My feelings, I think, could not possibly be exaggerated, nor can anyone understand them. I felt a fire within my soul the nature of which I am utterly incapable of describing. My bodily sufferings were so intolerable that, though in my life I have endured the severest sufferings of this kind—the worst it is possible to endure, the doctors say, such as the shrinking of the nerves during myparalysis and many anddivers more, some of them, as I have said, caused by the devil—none of them is of the smallest account by comparison with what I felt then, to say nothing of the knowledge that they would be endless and never-ceasing. And even these are nothing by comparison with the agony of my soul, anoppression, asuffocation andanaffliction so deeply felt, and accompanied by such hopeless and distressing misery, that I cannot too forcibly describe it. To say that it is as if the soul were continually being torn from the body is very little, for that would mean that one's life was being taken by another; whereas in this case it is the soul itself that is tearing itself to pieces. The fact is that I cannot find words to describe that interior fire and that despair, which is greater than the mostgrievous tortures and pains. I could not see who was the cause of them, but I felt, I think, as if I were being both burned anddismembered; and I repeat that that interior fire and despair are the worst things of all.

In thatpestilential spot, where I was quite powerless to hope for comfort, it was impossible to sit or lie, for there was no room to do so. I had been put in this place which looked like a hole in the wall, and those very walls, so terrible to the sight, bore down upon me and completelystifled me. There was no light and everything was in the blackest darkness. I do not understand how this can be, but, although there was no light, it was possible to see everything the sight of which can cause affliction. At that time it was not the Lord's will that I should see more of hell itself, but I have since seen another vision of frightful things, which are the punishment of certainvices. To look at, they seemed to me much more dreadful; but as I felt no pain, they caused me less fear. In the earlier vision the Lord was pleased that I should really feel those torments and that affliction of spirit, just as if my body had been suffering them. I do not know how it was, but I realized quite clearly that it was a great favour and that it was the Lord's will that I should see with my own eyes the place from which His mercy had delivered me. It is nothing to read a description of it, to think of different kinds of torture (as I have sometimes done, though rarely, as my soul made little progress by the road of fear): of how the devils tear the flesh with theirpincers or of the various other tortures that I have read about—none of these are anything by comparison with this affliction, which is quite another matter. In fact, it is like a picture set against reality, and any burning on earth is a small matter compared with that fire.

Affliction

Affliction: Great suffering.

Grievous

Grievous: Causing great pain or suffering.

Dismembered

Dismembered: Torn into pieces.

Pestilential

Pestilential: Deeply destructive.

Stifled

Stifled: Smothered.

Vices

Vices: Moral faults.

Pincers

Pincers: Claws.

Signal

Signal: Distinctive.

Bestowed

Bestowed: Granted as a gift.

I was terrified by all this, and, though it happened nearly six years ago, I still am as I write: even as I sit here, fear seems to be depriving my body of its natural warmth. I never recall any time when I have been suffering trials or pains and when everything that we can suffer on earth has seemed to me of the slightest importance by comparison with this; so, in a way, I think we complain without reason. I repeat, then, that this vision was one of the mostsignal favours which the Lord hasbestowed upon me: it has been of the greatest benefit tome, both in taking from me all fear of thetribulations and disappointments of this life and also in strengthening me to suffer them and to give thanks to the Lord, Who, as I now believe, has delivered me from such terrible and never-ending torments.

Since that time, as I say, everything has seemed light to me by comparison with a single suffering as I had to bear during that vision. I am shocked at myself when I think that, after having so often read books which give some idea of the pains of hell, I was neither afraid of them nor rated them at what they are. What could I have been thinking of? How could anything give me satisfaction which was driving me to so awful a place? Blessed be Thou, my God, for ever! How plain it has become that Thou didst love me, much more than I love myself! How often, Lord, didst Thou deliver me from that gloomy prison and how I would make straight for it again, in face of Thy will!

Tribulations

Tribulations: Distressing experiences.

Baptism

Baptism: Christian ritual in which a person is anointed with water and admitted into the Christian community.

Fervent

Fervent: Intense.

Compassion

Compassion: Sympathy with the distress of others.

This vision, too, was the cause of the very deep distress which I experience because of the great number of souls who are bringing damnation upon themselves—especially of those Lutherans, for they were made members of the Church throughbaptism. It also inspired me withfervent impulses for the good of souls: for I really believe that, to deliver a single one of them from such dreadful tortures, I would willingly die many deaths. After all, if we see anyone on earth who is especially dear to us suffering great trial or pain, our very nature seems to move us tocompassion, and if his sufferings are severe they oppress us too. Who, then, could bear to look upon a soul's endless sufferings in that most terrible trial of all? No heart could possibly endure it without great affliction. For even earthly suffering, which after all, as we know, has a limit and will end with death, moves us to deep compassion. And that other suffering has no limit: I do not know how we can look on so calmly and see the devil carrying off as many souls as he does daily.

What happened next…

Teresa's visions of hell influenced her work as a reformer. In 1560, two years before completing the first version of Life, she had made a decision to reform the Carmelites. She had long been troubled by the lax standards at the Convent of the Encarnacion, and she wanted to return the Carmelites to strict observance of the original rules of the order. After much opposition and struggle, in 1562 Pope Pius IV granted her permission to start the San Jose Convent for the Reformed Discalced Carmelite Order. Four nuns were transferred from the Convent of the Encarnacion to Teresa's convent. Next, four novices (probationary members of a religious community) joined the order against opposition from members of the church and the city of San Jose. This was the beginning of extensive reform efforts led by Teresa. She was instrumental in reforming not only the Carmelite convents for women but also the Carmelite monasteries for men. She was assisted in this goal by the Carmelite monk John of the Cross (1542–1591), who is also revered as a great mystical writer. Teresa spent the remainder of her life writing and traveling for the Reformed Discalced Carmelite Order. She produced numerous books, which are now considered classics in mystical literature. In addition to Life, these works include Way of Perfection (1564), Meditations on the Song of Songs (1566), Spiritual Challenge (1572), and The Interior Castle (1577).

There were several accounts of Teresa's last days before her death on October 4, 1582. According to one observer, she was kidnapped by Friar Antonio de Jesus Heredia to go to Alba to be present at the birth of an heir of the duke and duchess of Alba. Another account reported that Heredia ordered Teresa to go to Alba and she went willingly, even though she was ill. After arriving in Alba, she went to the convent, where she suffered a hemorrhage (uncontrolled bleeding) and was taken to the infirmary. Teresa knew she was dying, but she was joyful at the end. Witnesses said that a sweet fragrance filled the room at the time of her death. She was buried at the convent chapel in Alba, although many of her friends protested that she should be buried in Ávila. Her tomb is said to have emitted the same sweet fragrance and miracles were reported. Teresa was canonized (declared a saint, or one who is holy) in 1622, and in 1970 she was the first woman to be named a doctor of the church (one who defends Roman Catholic teachings).

Did you know…

1. On at least six occasions Teresa was denounced before the Inquisition for unconventional beliefs and irregular religious practices. She was never formally tried for heresy, however.
2. Nine months after Teresa died, Gracian, a Reformed Carmelite superior (head of a monastery), had her body exhumed, or removed from the grave. Although her robes were rotting, her body was well preserved. Gracian cut off her left hand and took it back to Ávila. He cut off one finger to use as a talisman (good luck charm), then reburied her in the tomb. Three years later, Gracian convinced the order of the Discalced to again exhume her body and take it to Ávila. Teresa's body was still preserved. The Discalceds considered this a supernatural occurrence since she had not been embalmed, or preserved with special fluids after death. They agreed to leave one arm in Alba to console the nuns there. By the eighteenth century, her body had been exhumed many times for examination and, little by little, body parts, bones, and pieces of flesh became missing.

For More Information

Books

Medwick, Cathleen. Teresa of Ávila: the Progress of a Soul. New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 1999.

Teresa de Ávila. The Life of Teresa of Jesus. Translated by E. Allison Peers. New York: Doubleday, 1960.

Web Sites

Knight, Kevin. "St. Teresa of Ávila." Catholic Encyclopedia. [Online] Available http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/14515b.htm, April 10, 2002.

St. Teresa of Ávila. Way of Perfection. Translated and edited by E. Allison Peers. [Online] Available http://www.ccel.org/t/teresa/way/main.html, April 10, 2002.

Teresa of Ávila. [Online] Available http://www.karmel.at/eng/teresa.htm, April 10, 2002.